


Five Strange Places Lois and Clark Secretly Had Sex

by museofspeed



Category: DCU (Comics)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-09-01
Updated: 2008-09-01
Packaged: 2018-08-12 08:07:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7927156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/museofspeed/pseuds/museofspeed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Title pretty much says it all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Five Strange Places Lois and Clark Secretly Had Sex

**Author's Note:**

> For a five things meme. [](http://bariman1987.livejournal.com/profile)[bariman1987](http://bariman1987.livejournal.com/) requested this.

**Title:** Five Strange Places Lois and Clark Secretly Had Sex  
**Fandom:** Superman comics  
**Characters:** Lois/Clark, mentions of Bruce/Selina.  
**Word Count:** 624  
**Rating:** R  
**Summary:** Title pretty much says it all.  
**Author's Notes:** For a five things meme. [](http://bariman1987.livejournal.com/profile)[**bariman1987**](http://bariman1987.livejournal.com/) requested this.

1\. "It's f-freaking cold here!" Lois gasped.

"You wanted to do it over every continent!" Clark said. "Some of them are cold!"

"I Kn-know," Lois said. "C-come on."

Clark pulled her close, wrapping his cape around her. "You know, most people are content with just joining the mile high club once."

"Most people aren't married to Superman," Lois said. She smirked. "Let's do this. We still have to get Australia and Africa before we go to sleep."

Clark laughed. "You're insatiable."

"Determined," Lois corrected, wrapping her arms around his neck. "And you love it." She kissed him. "Now...warm me up."

 

 

2\. "Clark, this place is covered in bird shit!" Lois said. "Why did you bring me up here again?"

"Well, it's your birthday," Clark said, adjusting his glasses. "And, I mean, you always like to, you know..."

Lois rolled her eyes. "What?"

"Um, do it. In. Um."

"Have sex in strange places?" Lois laughed. "Lose the glasses, Kent. You're much more fun when you aren't being meek and mild."

Clark smiled apologetically and took them off. "I'm not that bad," he said.

"Whatever you say, Smallville," Lois said. "So you decided that for my birthday we could have sex on top of the Daily Planet Globe? With all the bird shit?"

Clark's eyes blazed red and the bird shit burned away to nothingness. "How about now?"

"Well, sure, it'll be fun, but next time?"

"Yeah?"

"Do that coal to diamonds thing."

 

 

3\. "Oh!" Lois gasped as Clark pushed into her. It was so strange, being on the ceiling. She was falling onto Clark and being pushed up against the ceiling. It felt wrong and weird in exactly the right way.

It was certainly interesting.

As Clark floated them down to the bed, Lois murmured, "I'm not sure which is better, this or midair."

"We'll have to do a comparison," Clark said.

"Later," Lois said. "Sleep now."

Clark laughed quietly and put his arms over her.

 

 

4\. "Lois, this is crazy!" Clark whispered. "Batman will know! He knows everything!"

"You said he's out of town for a month, right? And you found a blind spot in security! It'll be fine!" Lois said. "We just can't move more than a few feet in any direction!"

"Bruce is one of my best friends! Also, he doesn't know you know who he is!"

"He's really not that good at keeping his identity a secret," Lois said. "And I still can't believe you didn't tell me."

"I...uh...knew you were smart enough to figure it out?"

"Uh huh. Come on, honey. Think of it as you helping your friend find holes in his security."

"Fine," Clark said. "But when Bruce confronts us about it, I thought it was a bad idea to begin with."

\----

"Er, Bruce?" Clark said. He knew he was blushing. He tried to will himself to be less embarrassed. "I, er, x-rayed your cave while you were away. To, you know, make sure no one had taken the giant penny or anything. And, uh, there's a blindspot in your security."

"Oh, yes," Bruce said. "I was meaning to fix it. Of course Selina always...I'll fix it at some point."

"Selina? Catwoman?"

"She noticed it," Bruce said sharply. "What about it?"

"Nothing!" Clark said. "Nothing at all! I have to go! Someone needs help!"

He flew off as fast as he could.

 

 

5\. "Hey Clark," Lois whispered. "There's an emergency. Better get to a phone booth!"

Clark laughed. "What?"

"No, really, Smallville. Haven't you ever thought about it? I mean, you get naked in them all the time."

"Lois, I hardly think - "

"Come on, please?"

"Fine," Clark said, "but one of these days we'll have to actually try it in a bed for a change."


End file.
